BISMARK, ND. On Tuesday, when Bill Schexmeyer’s U-Haul pulls out of town, North Dakota will become the first state to have fewer people than electoral votes. “Yup, with Bill gone that just leaves me and Phyllis.” said Bill’s cousin, Len. North Dakota has three electoral votes, the votes used in the U.S. to determine presidential elections.
Having only two residents has created a myriad of problems. “We both drive for Uber.” sighed Len. Further, with only two residents, filling the Governor’s seat, both seats in the Senate and the single seat in the House has led to logistical challenges.
“At the present, I’m Governor, and she’s a Senator.” explained Len. The two plan to continue the system developed when there were three residents. Each of the three held an office, and kept filling the fourth by resigning and appointing each other to different seats depending on the circumstances. “We messed up once and ended up with all three of us in Congress. There was no one to appoint the other to anything. We got a lot of laughs out of that one.”
While the two bask in their newfound fame, North Dakota has drawn the watchful eye of federal regulators. North Dakota gets back $5.23 in federal funding for every dollar the state contributes. Federal tax officials noticed an anomaly last year when North Dakota kept contributing all the money the state received back, only to have that amount multiplied by 5.23. “I wouldn’t know nothing about that.” said Bill, mischievously.