MILLIONS OF LOST PENS, ICECAPS FOUND IN TEENAGER’S CLOSET

icepensSPOKANE, WA.  The mystery of shrinking icecaps was solved today, when most of the missing ice from the both poles was found in a teenager’s closet here.  “This proves once and for all that climate change is a hoax,” tweeted President Trump, who invited the youth to model KellyAnne Conway’s new line of slacks.

The mystery of shrinking ice caps has baffled scientists for years.  “Yip, that’s them,” said a noted climatologist.  Each year, photos show massive chunks of ice breaking off the poles never to be seen again.  “We were wondering where they went.” said the scientist, “Who can find anything in a teenager’s room?”

The teenager said that he collected the icecaps as part of a seventh grade science project, and just decided to keep them in his room.  “Um, you know, what’s the big deal?” said the teen.

Along with the ice, millions of lost pens were also discovered in the room.   Scientists are searching the room, hoping to find lost keys, glasses, and Tom Brady’s Super Bowl jersey.

Photo Credit
Pens: Tolef
Ice: Christopher MichelOregon State University

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