5440390625_feab8a9520_bPresident Trump today signed an Executive Order opening secret death camps a month ahead of schedule after confusing the Order with a bill for pizza delivery.  “How funny is that!” chortled Trump, “Guess I should read what I’m signing.”

The Executive Order authorizing the opening of camps to exterminate enemies of the state was hastily drafted, and targeted the U.S.’s main enemies: Terrorists, Mexican illegal immigrant rapists, and CNN reporters. “This Order is going to cause a lot of confusion,” opined Fox News, “Does it mean Mexicans who rape illegal immigrants, or what?”

Trump has been accused of moving too quickly in changing decades-old policies, like banning whole populations from visiting the U.S. and not exterminating people in death camps. “He might want to work to bring people along more with his plans,” offered Paul Ryan, House Majority Leader, “It will take weeks to get the new camps up to speed, I can hardly imagine the pressure the new commandants are under.”

Meanwhile, Mike Pence had to pick up the tab for the pizza, “An extra-large, double meat at that,” grumbled Pence, “This is the third time already this week.”

Photo Credit
Gage Skidmore



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